We were woken in Stormreach by an old friend of Doru’s. Doru refuses to tell us what sort of friends they were, but we finally found out that his name was Magnus Fallus which seems indicative. We are uncertain of Magnus’s relationship with squirrels as well. Magnus apparently owed Doru some favors and offered us a significant (600gp) quantity of gold, supplies, and a spot in a caravan that was leaving soon for Last Chance. Trusting Doru to tell us if this “friend” was suspicious, we took the caravan and arrived in Last Chance without issue.
Magnus found an inn for us in Last Chance, and bid his farewells. We are unsure as to his involvement in what followed.
The jackass innkeeper was apparently paid to vacate the premises while we enjoyed a meal. Several Cultists entered the establishment, and we were forced to defend our lives and our alcohol from behind the bar. Thanks to Lorelei’s amazing magical snowglobe, there was much face smashing. Lorelei plans to make her fortune by inventing Khyberware.
We found a note on one of the Cultists’ bodies that said:
I git-thur dana tooboo yad winga tokka sleebu. Tooboo dees nur nur theme labadada choo. Ack thata al thur thur! Blesso don mang mang wong. Derk derb nert nert vedoo. Hoobada booba the the DEEEEDOOOOOOO!
(Rupert translated it. Lorelei helped.)
The heathens approach the Inn. I have bribed the innkeeper with his weak mind and sick greed. At the 9th candle-mark the Inn will be empty except for the heathens. The heathens may not continue lest they contact The Seer. If they do, they may stop the Rock-of-Sun! They cannot do that! Long live the Dark-Rock-Sunn!
We left Last Chance on foot, walked to Titan’s Teeth. Fortunately for us, despite the fact that the Titan’s Teeth is a sheer cliff face, there was a staircase carved into it. Unfortunately for us it was like 10,000+ steps tall.
Rupert had problems immediately. Zikali, a freaking warforged, had issues on the last part. We made it to the peak by sundown.
At the peak we saw a Frost Giant encampment, successfully snuck around them but were ambushed by zombies, spirits, and a zombie giant. An exceedingly fortunate Turn Undead obliterated the zombies, but Zikali was on the ground before the end of the fight. Lorelei’s kazoo and Doru’s everything smashed a ton of bad guy.
After this, we traveled down the western branch of the Hydra until we reached a drow village. Rupert was supposedly friendly with them but they seemed inclined to shoot/stab our faces off.
Successful quick-talking convinced them to let us tell our story, and Rupert began the epic tale in which he saved the daughter of the previous drow leader. Zikali provided a convincingly moving interpretive dance. The drow were impressed.
We were allowed to rest and provision ourselves. Zikali met with the local witch doctor and arranged to adopt a number of tadpoles. He also shook the hands of all 22 adult males in the tribe.
The drow tribe provided us with a boat and guides to take us down the Hydra. They took us to the edge of their own territory, then let us continue on our own in one of their boats.
We came to a downed tree in the middle of the river, and were subsequently attacked by a family unit of Arkansas ogres. Brother and sister ogre had been very busy, and tried to sic their 10 mentally deficient children on us. Lorelei went zombie on us by biting into a crafted brain. Rupert’s health played a very convincing yoyo.
And then a shadow covered the sun. Dun dun dun.